10 Lessons About Halloween We Learned from the Movies

That just results in scary old hags who look like Bette Midler coming back from the grave to wreak havoc on everything. No good.

Otherwise he’ll just keep coming at you with a big ol’ knife and a terrifying William Shatner mask. Not even the closet will be safe—and that’s really saying something.

Including Tim Curry asking you if anybody’s seen his tambourine. Don’t believe me? See for yourself.

Sam might come after you if you’re not. And trust me. You don’t want Sam coming after you.

Mixing holidays upsets the natural order of things. And besides, Halloween is just as cool as Christmas anyway. Maybe even cooler, because there are bats.

Hey, it can happen. Be especially careful if you start seeing a giant rabbit everywhere because it sure as hell ain’t Harvey.

In the words of Arthur Weasley, never trust anything if you can’t see where it keeps its brain.

This one speaks for itself.

Because you KNOW that if you fire them off, you’ll accidentally burn down a house with Someone in it, except that the Someone will miraculously survive, thus leading to them hunting you down and killing you with an axe. Better not to tempt fate.

No, really. Don’t go in there.