Don’t Ask Don’t Tell Gallery: Homoerotic Movies About The Military

Don't tell me there wasn't some gay stuff going on between Hawkeye and Trapper. There was also a crossdresser.

Any movie with a shirtless Jake Gyllenhaal is automatically homoerotic.

“He’s a beautiful man—I’d fuck him back in the states." [wrestle wrestle wrestle]

"I bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you."
-Gunnery Sergeant Hartman

Riding a phallic object to your death is totally an allegory for what happens if the military finds out you are gay.

The death scene in this silent WWI classic plays out like a love scene between the two male protagonists.

It's a lesbian love story set in Nazi Germany, and it's all about how true love transcends death.

Pretty much any film set in ancient Rome is going to be homoerotic. I think this is as good a time as any to use the word "bisexual," because bisexuals are always getting upset that critics never call bisexual characters bisexual, and they kind of have a point. In this film, the emperor Crasius enjoys having sex with both men and women. He is bisexual. Bisexual, bisexual, bisexual.

Jenny, Schmenny. Everyone knows the real love story was with Bubba.