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I’ve never been able to decide if Lorelai was doing the right thing by Rory, after Rory decided to quit Yale. In ‘Fight Face‘, I think we’re shown just how immature both Lorelai and Rory are, and how used they are to relying on the friend dynamic instead of the mother-daughter dynamic.
Rory, bundling up her hurt and lack of understanding from Lorelai about wanting to quit Yale, has gone off to live with her grandparents. Lorelai is hurt that Rory would turn away from her, but at the same time she pushed Rory past what she was able to emotionally handle – Rory wanted comforting and understanding, and help in choosing her future, and she didn’t get that from her mom.
Luke stands by Lorelai, saying they’ll do everything they can to get Rory back to Yale, and that’s when Lorelai proposes to him. However, what Lorelai doesn’t do is tell Rory, which has always seemed petty to me. Like it was Lorelai’s way of paying Rory back for going to live with Emily & Richard.
Lorelai seems to be trying to pretend that everything is great in ‘Fight Face‘, even going so far as to get a scruffy dog she names Paul Anka. If that’s not Lorelai needing to displace her mothering away from Rory, I’m not sure what that is.
Rory, perhaps feeling contrite and like making up with her mom already, goes to see Luke to ask how she is doing. Luke tells Rory that he and Lorelai are engaged, something which nearly breaks Rory’s heart. That pain turns to bitterness when Lorelai sees Rory on the side of the road doing her community service. At this time, Lorelai has already vented to Luke about not wanting to talk with Rory, about her “tough love” path. Lorelai and Rory exchange snide remarks on the highway and they yell about their mutual hurt, and that’s it.
Now, I can see Rory being immature about this whole thing. Her life is beyond confusing at this point and she doesn’t know what to make of it. There’s Lorelai, her lifelong best friend, not standing by her. She feels alone and betrayed when Lorelai doesn’t share her big news about Luke. But meanwhile, Lorelai has her own ‘fight face’ on and won’t back down, saying it’s back to Yale or no deal. Now, this seems immature to me. What do you think all this stems from?
Watch Gilmore Girls “Fight Face”
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525 days ago
> What do you think all this stems from?
lazy writers who couldn’t come up with a better story
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525 days ago
haha, agreed Wonder Y. they just needed to create some drama. just like when they made lorelai sleep with chris. ugh. :(
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525 days ago
I’d agree, I always wondered why Lorelai doesn’t try harder to wake Rory up and get her back on the right track. BUT (and this is a big, important but) Rory choosing Emily and Richard over Lorelai is the most hurtful thing Rory could have done to Lorelai, and both Rory and Lorelai know this. I think that fact, combined with Lorelai losing her best friend and ally all in one fell swoop make it quite understandable that Lorelai would react a little immaturely. And Rory closes the door to communication quite firmly by moving in with her grandparents and then not even bothering to tell Lorelai herself (she gets her grandparents to do it), so she really should not have been angry (or even surprised) that Lorelai wouldn’t have told her about the engagement. I always wondered why she was so mean to Lorelai; over and over again she does things to try and hurt Lorelai. It’s almost like she can’t figure out who to blame for how her life has spun out of control so she blames the person she is closest to – her mom.
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525 days ago
“Fight Face” – one of my least favorite episodes and certainly the dumbest title in the entire series. Always thought it should have been titled “Faux Fight” or “Fraud Fight” to more correctly reflect the state of the plot line. Only Rory’s pain at learning she had been excluded from her Mom’s great news rang fair and true.
As to questions or comments to the original post: While severe, hard-headed, and potentially counterproductive, Lorelai’s solution did not seem immature. She was being proactive in making sure Rory did not flush the previous 5 years of hard work on the path to achieving her dreams. If anyone knew what lost educational momentum can mean it was Lorelai and she was scared for Rory. As for Rory, this was at least the third time she went scampering to the grandparents when she could not deal with Lorelai’s disapproval so that seemed more self-protecting reflex than intentionally trying to hurt Lorelai. Lorelai’s pain was merely an unintended consequence. I always thought it would have made more sense for Rory to go to Lane prior to the grandparents to find some support and a place to relax and get her head straight before working things out with her Mom and her life [instead of that being the final step before reconciling with Lorelai]. But of course that simple solution would not have required six more excruciating episodes to resolve the situation and get the “girls” back together.
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525 days ago
I have to agree that it all seems a bit out of character at this point. I relate to the show because my mother came from a strict family and like lorelai seemed to rebel, which like Rory made me have to be a little more mature then others. We had a relationship very similar to theirs in that we were friends first and formost and people often questioned who was the mother and who was the daughter (on grounds of attitudes). That said There is no way that my mom would have let me give up on something so important so easliy an there is no way we could have stayed so made at each other for so long – I believe this would have realistically been the case for Rory and Lorelai as well.
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523 days ago
I think a large part of Lorelai’s reaction stems from the fact that Rory seems to be throwing everything away. Not only does Lorelai care about Rory’s happiness and know she will eventually be upset about quiting Yale, but she realizes that everything she has done to get Rory to this point is being thrown away. In past episodes, Lorelai has mentioned how difficult it was to go to HER parents for help. She had to ignore her own feelings she had towards her parents in order to do what was best for her daughter, in borrowing money. Now Lorelai is seeing all those difficult decisions be ignored as Rory gives up Yale, which both she AND Lorelai have worked so hard to get her to. Lorelai may be a tad selfish and immature, as can be Rory, but I think that’s where some of Lorelai’s behavior stems from.
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