“Let Them Go Dumpster Diving!” – Northwest Airlines

Here at Snarky Gossip world headquarters, we’re taking a break from our regularly scheduled gossip gorge to bring you some frugal living tips from Northwest Airlines – they suggest that you peasants do some dumpster diving, buy spoiled food, or buy crap with coupons:

• Do you really need four packs of triple A batteries, or orange-confetti cake frosting? Well, I guess not…geez…
• Use the phone book instead of directory assistance. What about free Internet phonebooks, brainiac? Who uses the paper phonebook anymore?
• Do your own nails. I guess I’ll have to tell Juanita she’s going back to Mexico.
• Rent out a room or garage. Dear Scary Homeless Man: Your ship has come in!
• Buy spare parts for your car at the junkyard. And while you’re there, could you pick up some rats for dinner? Tastes like chicken!
• Make your own baby food. Otherwise, you’re a crappy mother. Hear that, Angelina?
• Do  not use your calling card. How shall I call, then, O Great Budgeting One? Shall I leave it in the drawer till it expires? Good tip, asshat.
• Refinance your mortgage. And pay at least $5k in refinance costs.
• Don’t be shy about pulling things out of the trash. Watch out for needles and poopy diapers, though.
• Make your own coffee. Look, Ma, I’m Juan Freaking Valdez!

There’s a lot more, but that should suffice. From the Smoking Gun.

Tags: northwest airlines, dumpster diving