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After two super-sized reunion shows, the second season of Real Housewives of New Jersey is finally over. From hair-pulling to hugging, what a crazy ride it’s been. Last week, the first part of the reunion got the party started with Andy Cohen-shoving, Teresa Giudice yelling and lots of Danielle Staub denials. So when this wee kicked off we wondered — could the second half top it?
But with answers to some of our biggest questions, a Kim G cameo and an extension-pulling demonstration, last night’s part two delivered. Let’s dive in.
Question answered: Danielle really is now a lesbian. When Jacqueline Laurita accused Danielle of sleeping with married men, she later said, “Ask Lori if I sleep with men.” Well then.
And did Danielle really wish Jacqueline’s daughter Ashley Holmes dead via Tweet? She denied, claiming she had no idea her Twitter follower wanted the teen to kill herself. Really? Later Danielle broke down and apologized for “everything with Ashley,” adding that she really cares for her. THEN she hugged Teresa and Jacqueline. For real. It was actually a little creepy. But sweet, in a way. “It’s the biggest crock of shit I’ve ever seen in my life,” Caroline Manzo observed. “This was phony.”
Before she got all touchy-feely with the ladies, Danielle was still fuming over the hair pulling incident. Luckily, she brought props. She pulled a scary mannequin head our of her purse and explained how beads and hair extensions work. “There are teeth in the beads,” that stick in her hair, she said. When you pull one out, her real hair comes, too. “There are 80 of these in my head,” Danielle added helpfully. She invited Andy to tug, and at first he couldn’t get any extensions free. Is it even humanly possible to do what Ashley did?
Finally, we got an unexpected visit from shit-starter Kim G. After telling off Danielle and kissing Caroline’s butt a little, Kim got into a pointless bitch fight with Teresa, then took her leave. We’re still thinking she’s going to be the next housewife. Just sayin.
And, this play-by-play would not be complete if we did not mention our favorite moment of the night. Before the ladies apologized to each other and kissed and made up, Teresa mentioned how Danielle was taking boxing lessons. “Pay me $100,000 I’ll get in the ring with her,” Teresa said. Maybe Teresa is just desperate for the cash, but after last week’s blow-up, she showed she had the rage inside her to drive her to pummel Danielle. Hey, we’d pay to see that, too. Or at least watch it on Bravo.
(Photo by Andrei Jackamets/Bravo)
