College Dating Is So Messed Up

The other day, I got asked on a date by a college guy. Like, a real date, to a restaurant, with food. And it wasn’t Chipotle. I know, right?

It was an extremely shocking occurrence, as sad as that sounds. This is college: the land of dance floor make outs, walk of shames, and slutty Halloween costumes. How could anyone find romance in a place like this?

I like to consider myself a decently eligible bachelorette. I go out, I’m down with the World Series, and I watch Entourage. But I’ve come to expect that all these things qualify me for somewhere in the “indiscriminate groping at a party” to “drunk text” range. Because that’s what I’ve come to expect out of “dating” in college.

Every story that hints at love– or at least, companionship– at school seems to come out of the frats, the bars, or the walk from the frats to the bars. If things start to get serious from there, a budding lovebird might ask the other to a date party. Hosted by a fraternity, sorority, a capella group, or whatever, this affords the step up from “sketchy drunk dance floor make out” to “sketchy drunk dance floor make out in cocktail attire.” Dream big!

So when I got asked on a date in the middle of the street the other day, the first thing that came to mind was, “Wow, is this guy actually wasted at noon on a Monday?” Clearly there could be no other justification for such a request. Finding out he was, indeed, sober was almost as shocking as him asking in the first place.

A few days and text messages later, I found myself at a classy restaurant downtown on a Wednesday at 7:30 p.m. My date and I were sober. We had never hooked up. We talked without shouting over a blaring Ke$ha soundtrack. Was this what the real world is like?

The dinner went fine (a delicious free meal never hurt anyone), and we got back to campus around 9 p.m. As it was a reasonable hour, I didn’t have to worry about sleeping arrangements. Gone was the stress that I was going to have to scurry home in stilettos past some university tour. We settled for a cordial goodnight hug, because we were being the rare, mysterious grown-ups we’d heard about. So weird.

It ended up not working out with that guy, but the experience is something I definitely value. While it may have instilled in me false hope and high expectations for college dating, it is kind of nice to dream bigger than dance floor make outs. Not that those aren’t fun.

Morgan is a college student, looking for love in all the wrong places. Check out her tweets @momofink