Textual Healing: Drunk Texting Lessons Learned The Hard Way

Text messaging can often be the fastest way of communicating with yours friends and acquaintances, but it’s not always the best one. Especially when it comes to texting with guys. Here at Crushable we aim to help you sift through all the subtext and emerge relatively unscathed – with a little help from our friend Amanda Ernst.

Last week, I admitted that I, too, have fallen into the trap of drunk texting — as recently as last weekend. And, I was not surprised to hear that many of you had felt a similar feeling of dread after sending a text to a guy while intoxicated. Since you were brave enough to share your stories, I want to highlight my favorites. The ultimate take-away from all of these stories is, naturally, think before you hit “send.” But, when that’s not possible (due to a few too many vodka-crans), the best idea is sometimes to turn off your phone.

For one commenter, SK, it was a drink called Strawberry Kisses that was her downfall one night. “A guy I was seeing was encouraging me to send naughty texts,” she explained. “For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to say something like ‘I’d give YOU a strawberry kiss.’ He was amused, and totally cool with it, but I was so embarrassed I sent several texts saying how ‘I want to die’ etc.”

Echoing my advice about what to do if you “reveal too much to a crush,” SK said she regretted being so embarrassed and apologetic about her drunk sexy texting. “Looking back, I should’ve said something along the lines of ‘Well that was lame, but how about this –” she said. With that in mind, I’d like to amend my advice: when you feel like you’ve acted out of character and are embarrassed in front of someone you like, it’s always better to brush it off and act cool the next day instead of mortified — even if you are.

Another reader, Debbie, was drinking while casually texting with a new long distance beau. Ultimately, signals got crossed, as they are known to do via text. She was trying on some Victoria’s Secret goodies and felt that her guy wasn’t as excited about her outfit as she was. “I think I look great,” she texted back, rebuffed. “No worries I luv a challenge.”

“??? Sorry” her guy wrote. The next day, Debbie apologized via text, realizing that sarcasm and humor get lost in translation sometimes when you’re sending texts. “Now I am sitting here stewing and wishing I would have turned my phone off,” she wrote me. “Open mouth insert foot…or in this case…type message, hit send and wish you hadn’t.” Another thought: if you want a guy’s opinion on an outfit, send photos. Of course, that opens a whole other can of worms.

Lastly, I felt instantly sympathetic for another commenter, Catherine, who admitted to drunk sexting her dad accidentally. Ouch! Try explaining that one the next day.

No matter what your drunk texting experience (and I’m sure you have one if you own a cell phone with texting capabilities and drink), we can all admit that it’s not a good idea. Think twice, and when you know you’ll be tempted, try to leave that phone at home. Or just turn it off.

Do you have a story you want to share about text messaging and dating? Leave your thoughts in the comments, and you might see if featured in an upcoming installment of Textual Healing.