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Judy Greer’s Joining the Cast of Two and a Half Men, So Does That Mean We Have to Watch It?
Judy Greer has just signed on to join the Charlie Sheen-free cast of Two and a Half Men, where she’ll play the soon-to-be ex-wife of Ashton Kutcher’s character. I love Judy Greer? So does that mean I’m going to be tricked into watching Two and a Half Men? Damn you CBS and your casting trickery. More »
Crush Links: New ‘Breaking Dawn’ Photos Revealed
• Oops, just kidding! Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith are not breaking up. (Hollywood Hiccups)
• And Jada didn’t have an affair with Marc Anthony, either. Phew — so glad that’s cleared up. (Have U Heard?)
• OMFG you guys! New photos from Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn unveiled!! (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Who’s hotter, Alexander Skarsgard or Ryan Gosling? Tough call. (Lainey Gossip)
• Winning! Charlie Sheen is getting roasted…here’s a sneak peek. (Hollywood Hiccups)
• With baby number three on the way, the similarities between Ben Affleck‘s personal life and Matt Damon‘s are striking. Weird. (Lainey Gossip)
• And no, Matt Damon is not running for president. How ’bout them apples? (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
Video: Charlie Sheen Catches A Faygo In Mid Air At The Gathering Of The Juggalos
Charlie Sheen is basically a walking meme at the point. A strange amalgamation of libidinous urges, Web MD diagnoses, and hilarious turns of phrase, he barely registers as a human being anymore in most people’s eyes. Which is why I knew he’d fit right in at the Gathering of the Juggalos: as endlessly maligned figures in pop culture go, they’re a match made in Internet hell. More »
Gallery: 10 Horrifying Photos from the Gathering of the Juggalos
The 12th annual Gathering of the Juggalos went down this weekend in Cave-In-Rock, Illinois, and droves of the Insane Clown Posse‘s rabid fans were on hand to pelt glass bottles at performer Charlie Sheen and generally run around looking terrifying. How terrifying? “Wouldn’t want to meet these guys in a well-lighted alley while inside an armored truck” terrifying. Check it out:
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Crushable Dream Cast: Live-Action ‘Captain Planet’
Incredible news: Cartoon Network is working with Transformers producers Don Murphy and Susan Montford to bring our generation’s favorite environmentally-conscious cartoon Captain Planet to the big-screen — in a live-action movie! This was one of those shows that you realize now was incredibly cheesy, especially because it was so educational; but when you were a little kid, summoning a superhero from five magic rings to save the environment seemed nothing short of badass.
A great thing about this live-action movie is how removed it will be from the series, which ran from 1990-1996. So even though stars like Meg Ryan, Whoopi Goldberg, and LeVar Burton voiced the characters, you can have a whole new crop of actors in this reboot. Here’s our dream cast. First off, the Planeteers and the people who make them great. More »
Snap This: Bree Olson Shouts Out Charlie Sheen On Playboy Cover
Charlie Sheen‘s ex-girlfriend (sorry, “ex-goddess”) Bree Olson is trying to go legit – she’s quitting porn and transitioning into mainstream acting work. The first step on her reinvention tour was the cover of Playboy magazine – and, just in case you forgot who she was, she’s sporting a barely-there top with Charlie’s face on it. “He’s intelligent, he’s charismatic, he’s superfunny,” she says about Charlie. “And he’s good in bed. I mean, he’s had a lot of practice.” More »
Snap This: CBS Isn’t Wasting Any Time Rebranding ‘Two and a Half Men’ with Ashton Kutcher
I’m late on this photo since it’s from the CBS upfronts in May, but it’s still jarring: The network slapped together remaining Two and a Half Men stars Jon Cryer and Angust T. Jones with their new co-star Ashton Kutcher. Even though the show is currently on hiatus, CBS presumably wants to present a united front and shove all memories of Charlie Sheen‘s drug use and warlock-inspired ranting into a far corner of the TV audience’s brains. Something about this photo just really seems to be pushing it. I wonder if they’ll keep Kutcher’s long-hair-and-goatee combo, to really distance him from the clean-shaven Sheen. More »
Crush Links: Posted Victoria Beckham Photo Is Posed
• It’s not so surprising that Bow Wow has a daughter — but how do we not know the identity of his baby mama? (Celebuzz)
• Charlie Sheen is shopping a TV pilot where he would play Jack Nicholson‘s character from Anger Management. Haven’t we heard him whining enough? (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Lindsay Lohan says that unless you murdered someone, you shouldn’t go to jail. (The Frisky)
• David Beckham snapped this “candid” pic of wife Victoria looking all glamorous and pregnant. Yeah, right! (Lainey Gossip)
• A Smashmouth fan has the most bizarre request ever: He’ll pay frontman Steve Harwell $20 to let him film him eating two dozen eggs. The Internet has joined in this plea, but we ask that, for the sake of our gag reflexes, Harwell say no. (BuzzFeed)
Crush Links: We Guess Casey Anthony’s Only Hot If She’s Guilty?
• According to music fan/singles site Tastebuds.fm, Adele devotees are most likely to find love. (The Frisky)
• Now that Casey Anthony has been pronounced not guilty, Vivid Entertainment has awkwardly withdrawn its offer for her to star in a porn film. (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Mortals, never fear: Awful hair also happens to hot ladies like Selena Gomez and Alicia Keys. (Celebuzz)
• Blair Waldorf has a new idol to impress/overthrow: Elizabeth Hurley will play a sexy media mogul on season 5 of Gossip Girl. (People)
• Brooke Mueller threatens to sue if anyone mentions her at Charlie Sheen‘s roast. But if she doesn’t make it into any jokes, then we’ll forget she even exists! (YourTango)
Crush Links: Rihanna Needs to Curb the Drunk Tweets
• Chris Noth doesn’t think there’ll be a third Sex and the City. He also misses the time when the show wasn’t a media sensation. We miss the time before every relationship truth was summed up in a bad pun. (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon‘s Michelle Yeoh was banned from entering Burma because she’s making a movie about a pro-democracy freedom fighter. Well, what did they expect — to be met with open arms? (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Here are eight TV concepts for Charlie Sheen now that his on-screen persona is dead: Law & Order: Charlie Sheen Unit and The Real Housewives of Charlie Sheen, starring his ex-goddesses. (The Frisky)
• Even joking about “molesting” two girls at a club is a bad move for domestic/sexual abuse survivor Rihanna. (Lainey Gossip)
• Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga are trying to follow in Bethenny Frankel‘s footsteps by releasing their own alcohol brands. No surprise, Melissa’s sounds leagues smarter than her sister-in-law’s. (TheGrindstone)
Crush Links: Charlie Sheen Dies… Sort Of
• Remember JoJo? Remember how she was only 12 when her silly song “Leave (Get Out)” came out? Now she’s 20 and releasing a new album that’s “pop with anger management problems.” Sounds like someone’s been listening to a lot of Rihanna. (Celebuzz)
• Rutina Wesley says that her True Blood character Tara’s cagefighting lesbian relationship is the real thing, even though it sounds like Tara just got the same plotline (albeit bloodier) than Samantha on Sex and the City. (The Frisky)
• The Two and a Half Men team have made sure that Charlie Sheen has no loophole to return to the show: In the season premiere it will be revealed that his character, Charlie Harper, has passed away. As long as they don’t go the Shonda Rimes route and stay away from ghost sex, everything will be fine. (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
• Nigel Thornberry (from Nickelodeon’s The Wild Thornberrys) was trending on Twitter yesterday — check out his duet with Lady Gaga. (BuzzFeed)
• Gwen Stacy and Peter Parker are feeling the love off-screen: Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone are reportedly dating. (YourTango)
Charlie Sheen’s Last Goddess Natalie Kenly Has Left Him
Sad news from Tigerbloodville: Charlie Sheen‘s last remaining girlfriend Natalie Kenly has left him. She followed fellow “goddess” Bree Olson, who had also appeared in Charlie’s YouTube videos and in his stage show. Now that Charlie is girlfriendless for the time being, might I suggest a perfect new goddess candidate? More »
Conspiracy Theory: Charlie Sheen Is Paying Denise Richards Not to Trash Him In Her Memoir
Denise Richards has signed a deal to write her memoir. Although the book won’t be out until summer of 2012, Denise is already talking about some of the contents. After all, since her reality show got cancelled, she needs something to do. And evidently that something is saying nice things about ex-husband Charlie Sheen in the media. More »
Forget ‘The World According to Paris,’ Brooke Mueller Needs Her Own Show
Although it was intended as a vehicle for the Paris Hilton Redemption Tour, The World According to Paris is a non-starter of a show. So far, we’ve seen Paris complain about doing her court-ordered public service, treat her assistant like dirt, and preen in front of a mirror. However, her costar on the show, Brooke Mueller, is proving more interesting as the show goes on. More »
The Best Quotes from Roseanne’s Essay In New York Magazine
I really fucking love Roseanne. She’s a ball-busting woman who wasn’t afraid to take on the boys’ club of comedy, she doesn’t give a shit whether people think she’s pretty, and her sitcom Roseanne was one of the only shows unafraid to portray American life honestly instead of aspirationally. (Shocking fact: there are people in America who aren’t glamorous and skinny and live in New York or Los Angeles.) Reporters kept calling her and asking her to comment on the Charlie Sheen/Two and a Half Men situation, and instead of giving them quotes she wrote this kickass essay about her experiences working on a feminist show and how hard it is for women to get ahead in an industry that values dumb, misogynist shows. I want to get drunk with this woman right now. More »
Crushable Quotable: Charlie Sheen Congratulates Ashton Kutcher on His New Job
Now that Ashton Kutcher is officially replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men, Sheen had a few words of kudos and advice for his younger counterpart — and of course, he told Kutcher and the world through TMZ. More »
Crush Links: The Situation’s Dad Sets Up a Website to “FTLF”
• Carry Barbie’s Dream Home on your finger with this ring and other fun, noir-inspired jewelry. (Betty Confidential)
• Even though movie stars get more attention, it’s much more draining to work week to week on a TV show. Maybe we should cut Charlie Sheen some slack, then. (Lainey Gossip)
• Frank Sorrentino has set up a website called “The Confrontation” to mock son The Situation, or in his words, “to fuck the little fuck.” Um, OK? (College Candy)
• Jealous girlfriend spray paints on her boyfriend’s car, “Is Pippa [Middleton]‘s bum still better than mine???” (BuzzFeed)
• Gordon Ramsey is being sued by nearly every member of his wife’s family; they claim he subjected them to unfair wages and fired them from his empire. It’s Gordon Ramsey — what do you expect? (Celeb Dirty Laundry)
Casting of Ashton Kutcher Reinforces My Desire Never to Watch ‘Two and a Half Men’
After weeks of speculation around actors from Hugh Grant to Rob Lowe, there’s finally a casting decision for Charlie Sheen‘s replacement on CBS sitcom Two and a Half Men. And the lucky winner is Ashton Kutcher. You know, that guy who spent years mugging to the camera on Punk’d and blinking aimlessly while Mila Kunis acted around him on That ’70s Show. You know, the one who’s now more famous for being married to Demi Moore and doing Kabbalah ceremonies than for acting. More »
Textual Healing: Have You Ever Been Dumped By Text?
Text messaging is often the fastest way to communicate with friends and acquaintances, but it’s not always the best one. Especially when it comes to texting with guys. Here at Crushable we aim to help you sift through all the subtext and emerge relatively unscathed – with a little help from our friend Amanda Ernst.
Listen, break-up texts happen. It happened to Charlie Sheen. And, if you are a 30 Rock fan, you know that Condoleezza Rice also has been dumped by text message. More »
Crush Links: Kristen Stewart Pregnant? (No, But She Could Be)
• Crystal Reed, star of the upcoming Teen Wolf reboot, gives a sneak peek of MTV’s new series, premiering June 5. (Seventeen)
• Kristen Stewart‘s response to the Twilight haters who argue that Breaking Dawn pushes a pro-life message down audiences’ throats: “I could f—ing get pregnant tomorrow.” (Celebuzz)
• Why Kate Middleton should be able to present her wedding dress when she wants to — i.e., this morning at 5 a.m. instead of last night via a paprazzi pic. (Lainey Gossip)
• “The Hover Hand Song” mocks Britney Spears‘ new single, “Hold It Against Me.” (CollegeHumor)
• In a new interview, Alex Pettyfer sounds suspiciously like the unhinged Charlie Sheen. Oh, honey — that’s what you don’t want to do. (College Candy)
