Crushable » christmas

Parenting Lessons From Teen Mom 2: Belated Christmas Is Mostly Holiday Cheer, Some Holiday Tears

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 20:22:23 +0000

This week’s Teen Mom 2 was a little bizarre since it was a week removed: The girls celebrated Christmas with their respective families, in many cases having to do the tree decorating and presents opening multiple times since their babydaddies had separate families or their own parents didn’t want those guys in on the festivities.

There was plenty to be uncomfortable about: Chelsea‘s parents barred Adam from their homes despite him getting a “real” job; Jenelle whined about Kieffer being in jail and continued to ignore Jace; I’m convinced that Leah and Corey are living in denial… Oh, but Kailyn actually reconciled with Jo‘s mom, so there’s still hope for a Christmas miracle.

LEAH

DON’T: Overdo it on Christmas when your kids are so young

If Aliannah and Aleeah were five years old and one of them had a small optic nerve and Daddy couldn’t come to her doctor’s appointments because he had no sick days left… then I would understand Leah spending over $500 on Christmas presents for the twins. But at barely a year old, they’re not going to remember their second Christmas at all; there’s no need for such a lavish display that they’ll outgrow in a year. Especially when Leah and Corey need to be saving as much as possible.

DO: Be a good sport

You have to hand it to Corey. Usually he’s portrayed as grumpy or work-obsessed (especially when he found out how much Leah spent on the girls’ gifts), but he dutifully puts on the Santa suit to make his daughters’ Christmas even more special.

DON’T: Be in denial

I’m convinced that Corey and Leah have to be ignoring some pretty glaring problems in their relationship right about now, since Leah keeps chirping on about positivity and yet they’re currently divorcing. It’s getting painful to watch Leah be all “I’m so thankful we have each other on the girls’ birthday” while eating cake with Corey, and knowing that this will all go to shit very soon.

DO: Preserve their illusions

But then, when the girls start crying, Corey pulls off the fake beard and announces, “It’s Daddy!” Come on, dude—let the poor creatures believe in fairy tales for at least a few years. With any luck, this devastating reveal is all they’ll remember from Christmas, and not those expensive gifts.

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A Collection of Ungrateful Christmas Tweets Might Make You Lose Faith in Humanity

Molly Horan — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 20:46:42 +0000

Christmas is a time to get together with family and show them you care. Unless they got you the wrong color iphone.Then it’s time to knock them out with a ceramic reindeer.

Jon Hendren of Somethingawful.com (twitter handle @fart) wadded through some of the more ungrateful Christmas tweets and re-tweeted the most depressing. The resounding sentiment-if I didn’t get the right Apple product, I hate everyone involved, including Santa. These people hate Santa.

Some of these 140 character rants include, “didn’t get my car so im not feeling Christmas -.-,” and “After opening the presents I should have saved the $ I spent to get down here and bought myself an iPad since I didn’t get one. Wtf family!”

I think most people can relate to dreaming of a particular present under the tree and feeling a little miffed when it’s not there. But chances are you caught at least one UNICEF commercial during the holiday season, and after the moment of disappointment you realize how lucky you are for your warm house and your family.

So I’m going to assume the offenders @fart collected are just really fast typists, and almost as soon as the tweets went up they realized they didn’t really need a car, and went out to volunteer at a soup kitchen.

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Gallery: Celebrities Who Spent Christmas At The Laker Game

Liana Maeby — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 16:19:10 +0000

Hey, it’s a good thing that whole basketball lock-out situation got resolved so we can see who spent their Christmas day watching Kobe play at the Staples Center. While you were off listening to your grandma’s story about running out of paper towels, folks like Kanye West and Adam Levine were sitting courtside. Do you think the concession stand served eggnog?

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Six Christmas Scenes in Non-Christmas Movies

Molly Horan — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 16:04:47 +0000

Maybe by today you’ve sat through Home Alone, several showings of Elf, half a day of A Christmas Story, and even all three holiday Community episodes, but you still feel the need for some Christmas viewing. Here are five films that are 95% holly-less, with one scene of seasonal joy. They’ll be a good way to ease you into the Christmas free line-up you’ll be greeted with December 26th.

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Five Christmas Movies That Are More Sinister Than You Think

Molly Horan — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 16:19:27 +0000

If you want a Christmas-y horror movie, there are a lot to choose from Santa’s Slay to Black Christmas. But even if you stick to the kid-friendly flicks of your childhood, you might end up watching something bleaker than you remember. Cheery holiday tunes will mix in with dead dolls and a late Santa, and you’ll wonder how you could have missed all the dark undertones when you had to fit in Home Alone before bedtime.

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Holiday Gift Guide: 6 Last-Minute Gifts Under $10 For Everyone You Know

Natalie Zutter — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 22:00:55 +0000

So Christmas Eve is tomorrow and you still haven’t found the perfect present for your coworker/mom/sibling/significant other. Or perhaps you’re headed to a grab bag/Yankee Swap party and need a gift that could work for any of the attendees for only $10. Well, we’ve got a handful of great choices for you, from tech accessories to a small but unique sweet.

Some of these you have to order online, so you won’t be able to actually give your last-minute gift on Christmas morning. But handing over an IOU or a photo of the recipient’s gift is almost as good, right?

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What Your Christmas Day Movie Choice Says About You

Natalie Zutter — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 17:32:23 +0000

So it’s Saturday, December 25, and you’re booking movie tickets on Fandango. Obviously there’s the cliche of Jews eating Chinese food and watching movies on Christmas, but my family also made a tradition out of going to the movie theater after presents and while my dad cooked Christmas dinner. Regardless, during the holiday break you’ll likely see at least one of the movies being released this week. So which one is best for you?

Some came out on Wednesday; others are out today. Unlike the post with what your favorite classic Christmas movie says about you, I’m including trailers so you can have the best chance of choosing your ideal movie.

The Adventures of Tintin

What it’s about: Whiz kid journalist Tintin (Jamie Bell) buys a cool ship model, only to discover that it holds the key to a sunken treasure. With the evil Ivan Ivanovich Sakharine (Daniel Craig) racing to track down the treasure first, Tintin and his trusty dog Snowy team up with a drunken ship captain (Andy Serkis) and travel all over the world.

What it says about you: You loved building forts and going on Easter egg hunts as a kid.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

What it’s about: I’m giving you the cool, stylish trailer instead of the informative one because you already know the story: Punk hacker with Asperger’s teams up with newspaper reporter to solve a decades-old mystery.

What it says about you: You’re suffering a bad break-up and have to remind yourself that Lisbeth Salander had it much worse. That, and you’re an incredibly curious person—you have to know if David Fincher‘s take starring Daniel Craig and Rooney Mara matches up to the Swedish version.

We Bought A Zoo

What it’s about: Widower Matt Damon spontaneously decides to purchase a new house that happens to be on an animal preserve—so of course he and his kids have to rebuild it and take care of the lions, tigers, and bears (oh my) housed there. Plus Scarlett Johansson is the mouthy animal wrangler or something who slowly falls for Matt.

What it says about you: There’s still a collection of stuffed animals sitting on your bed.

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Heidi Klum Is A Pantless Santa Claus

Liana Maeby — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 15:50:21 +0000

There are certain things that I never need to see, despite any explanations, and one of them is a pantless Santa Claus! What are you thinking, Heidi Klum? Heidi tweeted this photo along with the caption, “Mrs. Claus going to work.”

So okay, then she’s Mrs. Claus and not Santa, but still — neither member of the Claus family should ever be without their pants! Heidi, what will your children think? I know they’re only toddlers, but they’re bound to have Twitter accounts by now.

(via)

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Cutegreggator: Cats In Christmas Sweaters

Liana Maeby — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 14:30:56 +0000

Ho ho ho and, um, meow meow meow. Christmas is but two days away! Here’s something to tide you over until Santa arrives down the chimney with a bag full of gifts: it’s a gallery of cats wearing tiny Christmas sweaters! Happy holidays from these guys.

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Holiday Gift Guide: 12 Bizarre ‘[Gift] Of The Month’ Clubs

Natalie Zutter — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 14:06:46 +0000

I look to my mom for gift-giving ideas, and she seems to hit a slam-dunk every year with “gift of the month” clubs—new books, fresh flowers, or jewelry delivered to the recipient’s house every month for up to a year. But in researching this culture, I came across several odd or crazy-specific ones that I had to share. For instance, did you know that you could get a crocheted skinny tie or a miniature jack-o-lantern? And I’m sure you want to know what the “Forbidden Food of the Month” club is.

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