Crushable » michael-cera

Celebrity Lookalikes: An Ode To ‘Woody Allen Chic’

Liana Maeby — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 20:15:23 +0000

Happy birthday, Woody Allen! You turn 76 today, and that is certainly something to celebrate. As much as Woody has done for cinema, he has maybe accomplished more in the realm of making it sexy to be a disheveled nebbish. Many of today’s celebs have co-opted “Woody Allen chic” and proudly wear their glasses, tweed and sweaters.

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Video Gallery: The Funniest Celebrity ‘Don’t Talk’ PSAs from the Alamo Drafthouse Theater

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 21:20:28 +0000

Now we get why Alamo Drafthouse is consistently voted the beast theater in the country. They’re the ones behind the viral video of an angry customer’s bleep-filled voicemail, which they used in their famous “Don’t Talk” campaign of PSAs that run before new movies. Today we stumbled upon their official YouTube channel, which collects all of their “Don’t Talk” PSAs — including the hilarious ones with celebrities like Jason Momoa and Dave Franco. Not all of them succeed — therein lies the fun — but you have to hand it to the theater and the stars for turning out such wacky videos.

Anton Yelchin, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, and Dave Franco

Threatening to make out with us? You’re gonna have to try a little harder than that, boys.

Michael Cera and Jonah Hill

You know, for the first two takes I thought that Michael was actually being a dick.

Jesse Eisenberg

FAIL, Jesse.

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Coach Eric Taylor Vs. 3 Michael Ceras: A Discussion with ‘Punching Tom Hanks’ Author Kevin Seccia

Liana Maeby — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 15:51:12 +0000

Good friend of Crushable Kevin Seccia (look how adorable he is!) wrote a hilarious book called Punching Tom Hanks: Dropkicking Gorillas and Pummeling Zombified Ex-Presidents—a Guide to Beating Up Anything. And although I respect Kevin as an able assessor of the strengths and weaknesses of various individuals, I still felt compelled to put his knowledge to the test against my own not unimpressive hypothetical battle skills. So we took to the ring, pitting Friday Night Lights‘ Coach Eric Taylor against three Michael Ceras.

Liana: Well, okay, so obviously Coach Taylor would win, and before I even get to why, let’s consider that Michael Cera — even 100 Michael Ceras — would lose in a fight to anyone ever.

Kevin: Oh Liana… sometimes i wonder if you know even the first thing about fighting multiple Michael Ceras. I say Cera wins. First: because he needs it more right now. He’s kind of faded from the spotlight, been pushed aside by Jesse Eisenberg and other mopey sorts. A win like this puts him right back in the mix.

Liana: Sure, but need can’t outweigh physical and mental deficiencies. Exhibit A: Coach Taylor has a full heart, Michael Cera has a paper heart.

Kevin: Okay, so you’re saying that since Coach Taylor is a grown man, physically strong, and known for coming up with winning strategies, he’d prevail. I agree with you on his strengths but you’re overlooking something. Coach’s main function, his reason for being, even more than winning, is molding vulnerable young boys into men. Boys like Cera! Coach would be far too distracted trying to save this kid to successfully defeat him He’d leave himself open. He’d leave that heart open. That sad turtle demeanor of Cera’s would melt him.

Liana: Hmm, good point. However, to that point, look at Coach Taylor. Just look at him. Who could harm a man like that? Cera, however, is eminently punchable. I’d whack him. His other two hims would whack him.

Kevin: No, they’d be united in their mopery, you have to concede that. They’re all they have in this world!

Liana: Coach Taylor is swift and strong and able, whereas Michael Cera’s deficiencies will be multiplied when there are three of them. They’ll trip over each other.

Kevin: I’d say that constantly being reminded of those deficiencies by two clones mirroring your every flailing gesture would cause you to focus and man up, at least slightly.

Liana: However, the intimidation factor of being up against Coach Taylor would make them crumble. They are not strong-willed, these Ceras.

Kevin: Every time he got them on the ropes, he’d start to pity them, instead of finishing them off he’d order them to go do wind sprints until they sweat through their pastel hoodies. During which time they’d recover. He’d literally be training them to defeat him.

Liana: I think you’re underestimating Coach Taylor’s toughness in the name of necessity. He can be cruel to those boys on his team and he’d be cruel to the Ceras.

Kevin: Three on one is tough odds. If we were talking about two Michael Ceras? No contest, Coach chalks up another victory Dillon Panthers-style. But not three.

Liana: Three Michael Ceras maybe could bench press three ladybugs.

Kevin: Unfortunately for that logic, this isn’t a “can three Michael Ceras bench press three lady bugs?” debate. We are still doing that later though, right?

Liana: Ladybugs vs. caterpillars; it’ll be riveting.

Kevin: Look, I’m not even saying all three Ceras live. In the end, Two Ceras lie dead near a wounded Coach as he whispers some last inspirational words to a squirrel he mistakes for his beloved Matt Saracen, while a lone, queasy and vomiting Cera stands over him. Victorious.

Liana: No, no, no. They’re one entity. They all die together or live together. Otherwise it’s not a victory.

Kevin: What? Is that a new rule

Liana: No, how is that a new rule?

Kevin: Are they physically bonded? Or you mean technicality wise?

Liana: Technicality – you can’t kill off two and still win. Or maybe you can, I don’t know how death works.

Kevin: So all Coach has to do and stop one and he’s got the win? Then, I gotta say, I lean towards Coach. I really would love for him to win. He knows how to come from behind… I just don’t know if he’d have enough in him.

Liana: I think his own worst enemy here is himself. If he can get over himself, he’ll win. So really, it’s a battle between Coach Taylor and Coach Taylor.

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Rumor Has It the ‘Arrested Development’ Movie Will Have a Really Meta Plot

Natalie Zutter — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 14:09:34 +0000

There’s good news on the horizon for Arrested Development fans! According to a source at Screen Rant, Fox and Mitch Hurwitz should be announcing the plot of the movie in the next few weeks. And until the official announcement, there’s also a big rumor (from the same source) that the movie will be incredibly self-referential. Here’s a hint: Who liked the arc where Tobias played George Sr. in a movie about the Bluths?

That’s right: We could be looking at a movie within a movie. Here’s the rumored synopsis, allegedly from the mouth of one of the show’s stars:

Ron Howard is making a movie about the Bluths using an A-List cast. But Dr. Tobias plays himself because nobody wants to play him in the movie. The Bluths decide to make their own movie in contention with Ron Howard’s.

The series finale did see Maeby (Alia Shawkat) pitching her family’s story as a TV show to Ron Howard, who told her he thought it would work better as a movie. And of course Maeby has her contacts in Hollywood from her stint as a teenage producer.

Honestly, it would be really fantastic for a movie that revolves around Maeby. She emerged as one of the show’s most hilarious characters, with her attention-grabbing schemes. Whereas the comedy around George Michael (Michael Cera) happened because his dad Michael (Jason Bateman) was too smothering, Maeby suffered from absolutely no attention from her parents (Portia de Rossi and David Cross).

The only part that sounds odd is the Bluths making a movie in response to the Hollywood biopic. That would fit for GOB (Will Arnett), considering his flair for performance; and you know that Lucille would have some zingers for the camera. It just sounds a little forced.

But like we said, in just a few weeks this rumor should be debunked or verified. We’re only asking that they bring back Annyong, Franklin, and Gene Parmesan!

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Gallery: ‘Arrested Development’ Paper Dolls, Y’all

Lucia Peters — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 20:13:56 +0000

You know what’s more fun than Arrested Development? Arrested Development paper dolls! If you’ve been mourning the show since its cruel cancellation at the hands of Fox, never fear: Thanks to illustrator Kyle Hilton, you can now create your own zany adventures with the gloriously dysfunctional Fünke-Bluth family! Check out more of Kyle’s work, including paper dolls from Parks and Recreation and Breaking Bad, here. Now if only they’d start getting that alleged Arrested Development movie going…

[Via Buzzfeed]

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Jesse Eisenberg, Tina Fey, and Sarah Drew All Place in the Awkward Olympics

Molly Horan — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 13:35:09 +0000

Ashley Rickards, who plays Jenna on MTV’s new show Awkward, does a pretty good job of portraying an awkward teen, what with her neck brace, playhouse sex, and to her “empowering” flashing. Still, if awkwardness ever held its own Olympics games, she wouldn’t even get the bronze. She’s played just one socially inept character: The stars in this gallery have made their careers as virgins, dorks, and women with doll hands. Here are the modern kings and queens of Hollywood’s ungraceful.

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Celebrity Lookalikes: Casting an IRL ‘Winnie the Pooh’

Liana Maeby — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 16:05:25 +0000

The new Winnie the Pooh movie’s out! As much as we love those animated characters, we kind of wish the thing were live action, though. Even if only to see who’d be cast as whom. So we took it upon ourselves to cast the flick as we see fit. Anyone who disagrees can take it up with Christopher Robin.

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Celebrity Lookalikes: Celebs Who Look Like Sharks

Liana Maeby — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 13:30:36 +0000

It’s July, which means that Shark Week’s just around the corner! We’ve already cleared our calendars and plan to spend the week sprawled on the couch with mountains of sushi. To get the festivities started early, here’s a gallery of celebs who so totally look just like sharks.

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How Not to Act Around a Celebrity: Michael Cera Edition

Lilit Marcus — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 20:16:06 +0000

A few weeks ago, I was walking down Houston Street in New York on a Saturday night. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a guy walking the other direction down the street. He looked really familiar – was it someone from college? Somebody who lived in my neighborhood? After racking my brain for a minute, I realized that it was Michael Cera. “Cool!” I thought to myself. “It’s Michael Cera!” We passed each other and I kept walking, late to meet my friend. All of a sudden, I heard a loud, piercing scream. It was one of the three girls who had been walking behind me in a group. “IT’S MICHAEL CERAAAAAAAAAAA,” the voice said. The three girls began running, chasing Michael down the street and trying to snap cell phone photos.

No matter what I think of Michael Cera or his choices in film roles, I didn’t think he deserved that.

We live in a culture that is soaked in celebrity worship. Celebrities’ faces and likenesses are used to sell us movie tickets, beauty products, and fast food. As a result, what do we expect from them? We ask for autographs or to pose for pictures with us. Some are happy to oblige; others ask to be left alone. But the sight of Michael Cera, who was wearing jeans and a hoodie and just walking down the street like a normal person, being chased down the block made me incredibly uncomfortable. Part of it is that, like most New Yorkers, I like to make a point of how utterly unimpressed I am seeing a famous person in the wild. Do you have the right to chase Michael Cera around Manhattan if you’ve paid for the movie tickets that went toward his salary? Or does he, like anyone else, deserve to walk around on a Saturday night without anyone giving a shit? I like to think that I’d be blase about seeing a famous person in the flesh, but if it were someone I geek out about (say, Robyn), maybe my feelings would be different. It’s entirely possible that the girl on Houston Street’s life goal was to meet Michael Cera, and she never would have behaved that way otherwise. I don’t know. But I can say that there are a lot of days I wake up and am incredibly thankful that I can go across the street to get a bagel from the deli without anyone ever taking a picture of me in my yoga pants and unwashed hair.

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