Crushable » Michaele Salahi

Neal Schon Bought Michaele Salahi $10,000 Worth Of Underwear

Liana Maeby — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 15:48:45 +0000

The saga Michaele Salahi‘s scorned undergarments continues! Last week, we brought you news that Michaele’s cuckolded husband Tareq Salahi put Michaele’s underwear up for sale, ostensibly for charity. Now we’ve learned that Michaele’s new fella, Journey guitarist Neal Schon, took the Real Housewife on a shopping spree to the Los Angeles lingerie shop La Perla.

Neal dropped over $10,000 on 32 bras and 38 pairs of undies. (Good gracious, that store’s expensive. Hey Neal – wanna come pay my rent for a year?) Neal has taken to adorning himself with symbolic accessories as well. The bracelet in the photo above, which has been blacked out, reads “fuck you.” Presumably that charming message is directed at Tareq Salahi.

What’s will the next move in this mischievous tale of bras and panties be? I, for one, eager await more news of Michaele Salahi’s undergarments.

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Tareq Salahi Is Selling Michaele Salahi’s Used Underwear

Liana Maeby — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 17:15:46 +0000

Would you buy fame-pariah Michaele Salahi‘s used underwear? Because her cuckolded estranged husband Tareq Salahi is selling them — supposedly for charity, although that may be a bit of a sham. Meanwhile, Michaele continues to live the high life with her new boyfriend, Journey guitarist Neal Schon.

Tareq claims he’s donating the proceeds of the underwear sale to charity, but in reality only 10% of the what he earns will go to Make A Wish Foundation and Comic Relief, his charities of choice. So it looks like Tareq is actually just trying to make a quick buck — but will he even be able to do that? Who actually wants to own Michaela’s underthings? Selling off her used, vagina-scented unmentionables implies this some sort of aura of sexiness around Michaele, which, frankly, isn’t what’s notable about her. People pay attention to her (to the degree that people pay attention to her) because of her outlandish antics and not because she’s some sex symbol with magical pheromones.

Maybe I’m wrong and hundreds of people will bid on the undies. More likely, Neal Schon will snatch them up (ugh, pun not intended) as yet another way to one-up his nemesis.

(via HuffPo)

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Michaele Salahi’s Adulterous Relationship With Journey Guy Is ‘Like A Fairytale’

Jamie Peck — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 18:58:22 +0000

Just one week after leaving her ridiculous husband for someone even more ridiculous, Michaele Salahi has granted an interview to The Daily Beast. Also on the line is her new rock and roll boyfriend, Neal Schon of Journey. Naturally, it contains much to mock, but it also elicits a surprising amount of sympathy from the reader.

For instance! Did you know that Michaele suffers from multiple sclerosis, and that Tareq tried to use that to manipulate her into thinking she would literally die without him? And that he rigged every room of their house with surveillance cameras? Whoa.

Also notable is the fact that Michaele actually dated Neal Schon first, but ultimately decided to marry Tareq because she thought life with him would be more stable, especially considering her medical condition. Basically, she is Lily Van Der Woodsen Bass Humphrey from Gossip Girl, except her Bart Bass didn’t die, so she had to take matters into her own hands.

But don’t worry, they said some dumb stuff, too. In addition to thinking that there are fairy tales about cheating on your husband with rock stars, Michaele seems to have a funny concept of discretion. On why she didn’t leave Tareq the night of the Journey concert at which that kissy face video was taken, she had this to say:

The night of the concert, Sept. 4, Neal urged Michaele to get on the tour bus with him. “I was pretty close to doing it,” Michaele said. “But then I thought, No, that’s not who I am. That would be public humiliation for Tareq.” She explained to Neal that she had obligations and things to wrap up over the next few weeks but she told him that night: “We will be together. I promise.” She went home with her husband that night.

I’m sure Tareq isn’t humiliated at all over the revelation that while he thought he was having a fun time at a bitchin’ rock concert, his wife was off in some dressing room making plans to cuckhold him.

Neal Schon, on competing for a lady’s affections:

“Hey, you wrote in your book she had to choose between us—and that Tareq won. Guess you’ll have to rewrite that book now—because I won!”

Yup, love’s a big old contest, and if you try hard enough, you might just win the giant stuffed animal of your dreams. Don’t stop believin!

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The Real Tragedy of the Salahi Divorce: Michaele’s Dog Rio Died of a Broken Heart

Natalie Zutter — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 17:11:13 +0000

This is animal cruelty, guys. It turns out the biggest victim in the Salahi divorce isn’t Tareq Salahi, who had to find out from TMZ that wife Michaele had left him for Journey‘s guitarist… It’s their dog Rio, who died last night. The Doberman had had heart problems, and after Michaele left, he literally couldn’t get out of bed. Rio loved Michaele and, according to Tareq, felt abandoned.

(That bit is up for debate: I don’t know if animals can catch on after only a few days that their owners are gone. My cat is happy to see me every time I come back to California, and that’s after me being gone for six months.)

Apparently when Tareq gave Rio his heart meds before bed, the dog started yelping and died soon after. Tareq seems genuinely broken up about losing his pet and is of course blaming Michaele for creating all the stress that led to Rio’s untimely end.

At least Tareq has one bit of consolation in all this: Since the Salahis’ prenup has a clause against cheating, Michaele won’t get any of his money from their eight-year marriage and won’t be able to file for spousal support.

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Michaele Salahi Tries to Get Attention by Leaving Her Husband for Journey Guitarist Neal Schon

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 14 Sep 2011 22:26:22 +0000

The only explanation we can think of is that Michaele Salahi panicked at Scarlett Johansson‘s nude pics stealing all of today’s headlines and decided to try and grab a few for herself. According to TMZ, the 24-hour drama for the Real Housewives of D.C. stars goes like this:

Tareq Salahi panicked and reported Michaele missing when she didn’t go to a hair appointment yesterday and called him from an unfamiliar number.
Even when Michaele and the sheriff’s department said she was OK, Tareq was sure she was being held for ransom.
Finally, Michaele spilled: She’s been dating Neal Schon, the lead guitarist for Journey, and ran off to be with him.

Mostly we feel sorry for Tareq; even though he went along with all the famewhoring and gatecrashing, no one needs to find out his wife is cheating on him in such a public way. (And with someone from Journey!)

Also — nice try, Michaele, but no one cares about your attempt at getting a national news story. Considering that you also got booted from Celebrity Rehab for not having an addiction, that’s two strikes. And of course, now you seem like even more of a selfish bitch.

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6 Ways Courtney Stodden’s Birthday Is Drastically Different From Normal 17-Year-Olds’ Birthdays

Natalie Zutter — Mon, 29 Aug 2011 18:04:33 +0000

So today is Courtney Stodden‘s birthday — and if she’s actually telling the truth about her age, she’s turning 17. That’s right: She’s younger than Justin Bieber, not even legal, and married to Lost star Doug Hutchison. Shudder. But it got us thinking about when we were 17, and how tame our teenage angst seemed in comparison to Courtney’s Baywatch-inspired photo shoots and yowls about being sexy while Doug paws at her.

Here are six things that normal 17-year-olds would be doing on their birthdays, compared to what Courtney’s up to:

Getting their drivers’ licenses or even a car vs. Having your sugar daddy drive you around

We’ve seen Courtney posing with cars in glamour shots and her music videos, but we have no idea if she actually knows how to operate one. Probably not, since Doug has likely learned his lesson from watching Hugh Hefner and The Girls Next Door and knows that he can’t give his child bride a shred of independence or she’ll go running off.

Having sex with someone their own age vs. Getting married to an older man

I blame teen flicks for making me think that 17 is the magic age to have sex, but that seems to be the trend in every movie. But sex when you’re in high school doesn’t mean you’re going to spend the rest of your life with the guy… except when you’re Courtney, who apparently just couldn’t wait to get hitched. Unfortunately, we already know that she thinks Doug is “a tiger” in the sack and loves how much experience he has.

Lying to their parents about losing their virginity, among other stuff vs. Sharing everything

We know some of the gory details from above because Courtney’s mom was the one who proudly announced that her daughter was a virgin before marrying 51-year-old Doug. That oversharing, coupled with Courtney and Doug’s cringeworthy interviews, means that the Stoddens know everything about their daughter — and still don’t ground her.

Buying your first porno vs. Making a soft-core porn Twitter

Normal kids would be sneakily downloading porn out of curiosity before they can legally get the stuff at 18. Then there’s Courtney, whose Twitter account is nothing but steamy ruminations on pleasuring herself to Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, sucking lollipops, and walking on the Hollywood hills. It’s natural for kids to figure out sex for themselves, but not Courtney’s attempts to seduce the entire Internet — take her most recent tweet:

Celebrating the last night of being sweet-n-sexy 16 by wearing NOTHING but my tasty bday-suit! Mmm; Yummy! ;-)

Going to prom vs. Attending celebrity parties

Courtney and Doug haven’t yet become red-carpet fixtures, but we bet that we’ll start seeing them crop up in photo spreads from big-name parties. We wouldn’t be surprised if they took a page from Tareq and Michaele Salahi‘s book and gatecrashed a big political party in order to get the reality show they want. Which brings us to…

Applying for college vs. Trying to get a reality show

Junior year is the toughest for all high-school kids due to the major stress of the SAT and having to make ourselves seem awesome through one measly application. But thanks to her fame, Courtney’s an open book. She couldn’t get into a school to save her life, but she’s happy to be a plastic-bodied, rambling reality star. So everyone wins!

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Former ‘Real Housewife’ Michaele Salahi Has a Single, And It Is Horrible

Lilit Marcus — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 15:19:43 +0000

At this point, I suspect every Real Housewives cast member already signs a contract to launch their own shapewear line and record a single before they even appear on a single episode. Although Real Housewives of DC was mercifully cancelled, White House party crasher/person who lies about having MS Michaele Salahi is not going away. She was kicked off of Celebrity Rehab for not being addicted to anything besides attention, Playboy passed on her naked photos, and now she’s – of course – launching a single. The song is called “Bump It,” and it is sadly not about the cool hair thingie that makes you look like you have more volume up top. She sing-talks most of the way through it, which is standard, but the scantily clad backup dancers are new. On a scale of bad to awesomely bad, Michaele’s single has nothing on Countess LuAnn‘s “Money Can’t Buy You Class” or Kim Zolciak‘s “Don’t Be Tardy for the Party.” It’s not even funny enough to make fun of, and that’s the sure sign of a reality star crossover fail.

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Playboy Says No to Naked Pics of ‘Real Housewives of DC’ Star Michaele Salahi

Lilit Marcus — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 22:07:28 +0000

Although White House party crasher and former Real Housewives of DC cast member Michaele Salahi had supposedly signed a deal to pose for Playboy, the magazine reportedly declined to publish the results of her photoshoot. Harsh! The magazine reportedly told Michaele “There is no opportunity this calendar year to offer you a cover opportunity or place for your pictorial.”

Considering that Playboy recently ran these super-cheesy ’80s-style photos of Dancing with the Stars pro dancer Karina Smirnoff, I’m dying to know what Michaele’s photos looked like. Considering that the magazine has no shortage of airbrushers, I have to wonder what was in the photos that would cancel out Michaele’s (dubious) name-recognition factor. I predict they’ll hit the internet sooner or later.

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Crush Links: How Could You Hold a Grudge Against Charlie Sheen?

Hannah Rose — Sat, 09 Apr 2011 18:10:29 +0000

Charlie Sheen wants to work this “s–t” out with Chuck Lorre. Good luck, pal. Let us know how that goes. (Us Magazine)

Betty White isn’t amused by Charlie Sheen or Lindsay Lohan. Take that, young Hollywood! (Dlisted)

Pia Toscano, the latest American Idol hopeful to be kicked off, has scored her own record deal. (Oh No They Didn’t!)

Michaele Salahi said the reason Real Housewives of D.C. was canceled was because she refused to be on it. Yeah… because the Salahis have really won over America. (Crazy Days and Nights)

Here are two spoiler clips from Will Ferrell’s upcoming appearance on The Office. (Jezebel)

Daryl Hannah reportedly owes $62,622 in taxes. Woops! (Perez Hilton)

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Andy Cohen Hints That ‘Real Housewives of DC’ Might Be Back – Minus Michaele Salahi

Lilit Marcus — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 18:20:28 +0000

Although Real Housewives of DC was the franchise’s least successful season yet, Bravo exec Andy Cohen hints that they might bring it back for another round. On Regis and Kelly last week, Cohen admitted that Bravo was “in negotiations” to bring Real Housewives of DC back to the air, but there was one snafu: the network wanted controversial Housewife/White House party crasher/compulsive liar Michaele Salahi to come back, but the other four housewives banded together and refused to work with her. Mary Schmidt Amons, Cat Ommaney, Lynda Erkiletian, and Stacie Scott Turner reportedly tried to negotiate as a group, just as the Real Housewives of New Jersey did when they wanted troublesome Danielle Staub booted from the show.

While Michaele Salahi and her omnipresent husband Tareq Salahi were unpopular with other cast members, they were the only members of the otherwise-lackluster DC cast to get press attention. In addition to the White House party crashing incident, they were quickly exposed as frauds and grifters, lying about everything from owning a winery to having MS (Michaele). Recently, Michaele was booted from Celebrity Rehab when it was revealed she didn’t actually have an addiction to anything.

Despite the fact that DC was a poorly-received season of the Bravo franchise, I’m not opposed to bringing it back. Orange County has lost steam, and New York has been running on fumes for some time now. DC still has potential (Cat’s divorce and citizenship issues have a lot of storyline potential, and Stacie’s discovery of her long-lost Nigerian father and his family were my favorite plot of the season), but it will require some retooling. I won’t miss Michaele – like Danielle, she sucked up all the available air and went from “love to hate” to simply “hate,” making the whole show less enjoyable in the process. But they’ll need to replace her with someone willing to be a little more open on camera – the opposite of Mary, who, while interesting, is media-savvy enough to keep most of her business offscreen. That’s fine for a regular person, but a Housewife needs a little bit of bite to keep from getting the Lisa Hartwell Wu treatment. And considering Cohen’s announcement that the show won’t be adding any additional cities, DC is the one city in the franchise that still feels like a blank slate.

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