• Watch George Clooney get hitched. (Hollywood Hiccups)

• Grey’s Anatomy premiere sneak peak. [spolier alert] (Have U Heard)

• Justin Bieber making late night calls to Kendall Jenner? (Celeb Dirty Laundry

• Congrats to Ne-Yo on getting engaged. (Hollywood Hiccups)

•Taylor Lautner infatuated with Kristen Stewart? (Have U Heard)

• Dame Helen Mirren walking down  the red carpet. (Lainey Gossip)

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The Lohans are notorious about crying wolf at even the smallest joke, so we’ve arranged Lindsay’s cases in order from non-issues to actual problems for her image.

ABOUT AS IRRITATING AS A MOSQUITO BITE: Glee‘s Spanish diss

Speaking of Dina, Lindsay’s momager told the press she was frothing mad last fall when Glee made Lindsay the butt of a joke. When Gwyneth Paltrow‘s substitute teacher is taking over Mr. Schue’s Spanish class, she asks in Spanish, “Lindsey Lohan is totally crazy, right?” (Their misspelling, not ours.) When teaching the kids how to count to five, she offers, “How many times has Lindsay Lohan been to rehab?”

In the realm of defamation, this is nothing. It wasn’t even a creative insult!

YOU’RE KIND OF ASKING FOR IT: Pitbull’s “Give Me Everything” lyrics

Neither Pitbull nor the song’s writers Ne-Yo and Afrojack actually say anything negative about Lindsay’s character. They’re just stating a fact: She has been in jail. Jail cells, one can reasonably assume, are locked. It’s actually a pretty smart play on words, you guys.

THIS MIGHT MAKE GETTING FUTURE JOBS A PROBLEM: The E*Trade “milk-a-holic”

Lindsay actually settled this one for an unspecified amount of money, but the whole case really just made her look like a baby. Ironic, since that’s what she protested: E*Trade’s commercial where two babies were arguing over why the boy baby didn’t call the girl the night before. The girlfriend asks, “Were you hanging out with that milk-a-holic Lindsay?” and on cue, a girl baby pops into view from the boyfriend’s side hiccuping, “Milk-a-what?”

The best part was when Lindsay’s lawyers said that E*Trade violated her rights by using her “name and characterization” without her approval. Imagine a Regina George voice when I say this: So, you admit you’re an alcoholic?

OKAY, THIS COULD MAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE LOOK BAD: Satirical biopic Dogs in Pocketbooks

The Lohans immediately jumped on Dogs in Pocketbooks, a satire of celebrity culture with a specific focus on Lindsay and her disastrous career. While screenwriter Charles Casillo didn’t hide the identity of his “muse” when he first announced the project, the Lohans’ reaction made him backtrack a bit and claim that the main character was a composite of all young, wild Hollywood actresses: Lindsay, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and even going back to Marilyn Monroe.

Unless Lindsay’s people put an injunction on this one, Lydia Hearst Shaw will play the movie’s unhinged starlet heroine.

OH SHIT THIS IS ACTUALLY A PROBLEM: The suits against Lindsay

The lesson here is that Lindsay needs to stop whining to the judges about how her name is being dragged through the mud and focus on the actual shit she’s knee-deep in. As if her arrest in 2007 — for stealing an SUV while under the influence of coke — weren’t bad enough, in 2008 three guys sued her for battery and false imprisonment during her wild ride that night. Lest you think, But that was three  years ago, she’s turned things around, think about this: This past February, spray tan company Tanning Vegas sued Lindsay for an unpaid tanning bill of $25,000.

So right now, her name is already synonymous with “drunken flake.”

Related posts:

• Video: Lindsay Lohan Is Banksy
• Snap This: Samantha Ronson Resembles Ex Lindsay Lohan in Her Smirking Mugshot
• Questionable Choices: Is Lindsay Lohan Wearing Cargo Slacks To Court?
• Art Crush: Lindsay Lohan, Art Star

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Mena Suvari tied the knot with producer Simon Sestito in Vatican City on Saturday. More importantly: What did her hair look like?! (People)

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The night’s host B.J. Novak couldn’t resist making jokes on the red carpet, too, claiming he thought Webby organizers had confused him for SNL head writer Seth Meyers, a former Webbys host, when they asked him to the do the job. During his monologue, B.J. had attendees laughing over his advice for Facebook and Twitter to increase privacy: put the “search” and “What’s on your mind?” bars farther apart and make them look different.

Later, Will and friend and co-star Jason Bateman, who also work together on new web project DumbDumb, presented Amy with the Best Actress Webby for her work on the web series Smart Girls at the Party.

Other stars walking the carpet included Webby presenters Ne-Yo and Ben Folds and those who accepted awards, Isabella Rossellini, Gilbert Gottfried (holding the Aflac duck, who was very well behaved) and Lisa Kudrow.

“Doing a web series has been especially fun,” Lisa told Crushable about her work on the Webby Award-winning Web Therapy, which is becoming a TV show. “I don’t remember the last time..when people would just get together, and put up a show and find a stage to do it when it was this free and fun.”

OK Go, a favorite band of the Internet and Webby winner for Film & Video Artist of the Year, also stopped to chat with Crushable. “Webbys and Grammys are kind of different things,” bassist Tim Nordwind told us when asked which he felt was the more prestigious award. “We’re of the mind that nerds are the new rock stars. And if that’s true, then hopefully we’ll be winning more and more Webby’s as time goes on.”

“I think they have dinner here for us tonight,” added bandmate Dan Konopka. “So it’s a totally different sort of ballgame.”

Check out our gallery for more pics from the Webby’s red carpet

Want more from the Webbys? Here’s some video from last night, including some of the night’s 5-word acceptance speeches.

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Last night, we were on hand as Cosmo magazine honored its Fun Fearless Males of 2010. We talked to Kellan Lutz, Nathan Fillion and Paul Wesley and snapped pics of Gerard Butler, Ed Westwick, Ne-Yo and Chris O’Donnell.

Check out our gallery below for photos of the event:

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Image: used with permission by Newscom

Ne-Yo worked with Lindsay Lohan on her buzz track, “Bossy“. He thought the track would suck and the album would suck, but Lindsay blew him away. He wanted to apologize to Lindsay for not believing in her.

“[It's a] quality record,” Ne-Yo continued. “One that I didn’t think she was going to be able to pull off. Again, I will admit that. Straight up and down. I had to eat my words. I tried to call her and apologize for the assumption.”

Photographs: Lindsay Lohan at the Neil George Hair Salon on August 20th. One more photo after the jump…

Image: used with permission by Newscom

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